Teen Gothic

I'm really happy that this happened to me and I never thought I'd ever be noticed by a favorite member of one of my favorite goth groups ever so this is just so exciting to me and I really wanted to share 😀

First pic shows Larissa hugging a fan. Before she hugged them, that fan shouted “Larissa, I love you!” and I remember seeing her smile right after. Someone also gave her flowers. She seemed super happy at the end of the show. It was quite a sweet moment.

So here’s the story of why seeing Lebanon Hanover was an exciting moment for me + the experience, I don’t mind sharing haha!

In 2017, I was 14/15 and discovered Lebanon Hanover through the magical Youtube algorithm. Although I would listen to other goth bands since I was about 10 or 11, I didn’t fully engage with the goth subculture until I heard “Gallowdance”. They were the more distinct bands that got me specifically into the music of the subculture. LH’s DIY production and homemade music videos inspired me to pick up bass and become a musician and I’m not sure what I would be without them (in the music department). So seeing them was like a Mecca for me.

Back in 2018, they announced a U.S. tour, which was news since they only did shows in Europe and later South America at that point. I rushed to check out the tickets and was bummed that the venue in LA was 21+ (I was a minor at the time). Then, that entire US got cancelled due to an apparent Visa rejection. I was also bummed that it could make them iffy about coming to the US in the future.

I started getting into the other bands and sorta forgot about their social media. So years pass and I get a tiktok mentioning LH’s current US tour. I paused and saw an LA show a week away. The LA show was in a venue that was 18+, so I’m glad I wasn’t a teen when I was LH’s superfan anymore, haha. When I bought them, the tickets were about $ 55 each; expensive for a niche band without crazy theatrics in a small venue but I still immediately copped. Although I admit I got the impression that they’re not great live, I was fuckin EXCITED!

I went with my mom because she’s basically my best friend and the only person I know who’d go to a concert with me. The tickets nor venue’s social media didn’t provide clear info about when they start so we assumed it was 6 (it either said doors open at 6 or LH’s at 6) and panicked when we were running late.

As we were pulling up, we saw a bunch of goths and immediately knew we weren’t lost. We line up and get ID’d, the guy working there marked my hands (assuming because I was under 21) and scanned our tickets. The security briefly checked us and right we go in the venue and upstairs to the “disco” room that their stage is held in. From about 6:15-7:30, there were DJs before the show, playing darkwave and industrial music so we were relieved we weren’t too late.

At around 7:30, the DJ set ends. A roadie came and tuned their instruments, checked the synths and electric drum triggers and the lights dim.

Lebanon Hanover enters. They open with “Alien”. It was an emotional moment for me because that song was extremely relatable and an anthem for me.

I mostly swayed but got really turnt (and unfortunately consistently sang along, loudly and terribly. Apologies to fellow goers) to “Kiss me until my lips fall off” and “Totally Tot” (which I just learned that “tot” means dead in German, I thought it was one of those fake words that songs use to for the sake of catchiness, so now I “feel” that song a little better).

Although I been to Molchat Doma and admit that their show was more put together, I still had a blast. The venue’s room was small, hot and stuffy. People swayed, sang along and were just as excited as I was. It was quite a raw experience.

They end their show with IIRC, “gallowdance”. Larissa handed her guitar pick to a girl and they leave with cheers. The fan who got hugged (pictured earlier) starts a crowd chant, repeating “encore!”.

We chanted until they got back up, people screamed! They play “babes of the 80s” and “Come Kali” to as their encore. Another fan hands Larissa flowers and they both thank us for being incredible a second time. The show ends.

I exit the room feeling renewed, in a sorta spiritual way. The line for the official merch looked too long for us so we left the venue. Outside, a lady was selling presumably bootleg tshirts. I regretted not getting the official shirt so I got the presumed bootleg to mark the memory and we head back home.

I’m so glad I got to see LH after all these years and believing it wasn’t possible. Would I see them again? I think once was enough for me but experiencing “Totally Tot” live changes that opinion.