Teen Gothic

Feel free to skip straight to the questions at the end of this post. The questions are the heart of this post. I'm not going to be offended if you skip past my own answers. I practically wrote an essay.

For me, it was discussion groups and message boards in the early and mid-2000s. I'm the kind of person who's always appreciated horror and the darker side of life, because sometimes"dark" really was "deep and thoughtful". I fell in love with the allure of goth. A subculture known for embracing misfits like me.

I was lucky enough to know people who loved actual goth music, many of whom were first-wave, involved in the music scene back in the 80s. I was never into Marilyn Manson or VampireFreaks and the other popular silliness that the mainstream has wrongly associated with goth. No black trenchcoats or baggy pants with wallet chains or shocking white face paint.

I'll admit that I was a little bit edgy and had to bite back my attitude. (Gothic Miss Manners was a delight! Jillian Venters. These days she's blogging as Gothic Charm School. She's published an excellent book on etiquette for goths.)

So here's me in my early to mid-teens devouring all the music I could find through mixtapes, forums, blogs, piracy, and MySpace. I did buy CDs, but only for friends—a Dif Juz CD for a friend who ran the Faith & the Muse mailing list, several mixtapes for other babybats and for the angsty mall goths in my online social milieu.

Anyone remember LJ? LiveJournal's "gothmusicshare" community was a godsend. Lakini Malich and Polina of the Drop Dead Festival spearheaded it. (I've hear that Lakini/Dan was a creep and an opportunist who would take credit for "discovering" lesser-known bands that his mutuals had posted about first. Such a disappointment.)

Or music blogs? I was thrilled when a certain blogger who I held in high esteem reached out to me over SoulSeek to compliment my music collection. Ahhh, so many happy memories.

I followed Mick Mercer online. Went to clubs, promoted club nights, and experimented with DIY. Went to see goth bands and musicians at concerts. Decked myself out in full trad goth outfits. A rat's nest of black and purple backcombed hair. (I couldn't find Aquanet, sadly.)

Visited Camden Town in London with my goth fiancé and purposefully, shamelessly indulged in glorious clichés: Snakebite and black at a goth pub called The Dev. CDs and Alchemy Gothic jewellery, including that massive silver bat necklace you see everywhere. Ankhs! Absinthe! An Eye of Horus pendant! Photos in gorgeous old cemeteries covered in vines! Horror movie marathons! Halloween everything!

Life was fun, sometimes, despite that I battled clinical depression for several years.

My fiancé had band posters above his bed. Andrew Eldritch and Wayne Hussy watched us make love.

We went to every club night and every concert.

I rolled my eyes at the ridiculous amount of Nightmare Before Christmas swag in the shops and malls. (But I liked the Jack and Sally Kleenex box covers.)

I was beginning to realize that I didn't feel comfortable in corsets or fancy dresses. Years later, I learned that I'm agender.

Anyhow, around 2010, I was in university. My active participation in the subculture ended. I stopped dressing "goth". I stopped listening to the music. My fiancé and I had long since broken up. My online social circle had dissipated.

As of 2018, I'm back, finding new music through Bandcamp, this particular sub, r/releasethebats, and Twitter. I'm looking forward to catching up.

That's my story. Forgive the length; I enjoy talking about all of this. What about you? You don't have to give your entire life history like I did. My questions:

1) How and when did you first get involved in the subculture? Was it online or IRL, or both? Were you a misfit, aside from your friend group, or were you popular?

2) Related to the above: how did you locate goth music?

3) Were you a regular at clubs, or not so much?

4) Were you able to attend concerts?

5) Were your friends goth?

6) Did you take leaves of absence from the music?

6) Anything else/any fun or nostalgic anecdotes to share?

Thanks for reading. 🖤

Dearest Goths,

I am looking for Gothic (or Post-Punk & Wave) songs with religious or spiritual lyrics (not critics, more like gospels and prayers). Please note to which religion the song belongs. Thank you very much!

Post your links to new releases from 2000 or later, let's give some focus to new music. In the list below, you'll find some new releases from the past few weeks!

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Here's some great new post-punk/goth releases:

False Figure – "Castigations" [Deathrock] (CA, U.S.A)

Slaughterhouse – "Halloween" [Deathrock] (CA, U.S.A)

Haunt Me – "Don't Fall Asleep" [Post-Punk / Darkwave] (TX, U.S.A)

Cataphiles – "Cataphiles" [Deathrock] (Germany)

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Want more? Check out our full 2021 Spreadsheet, 2022 Spreadsheet, and our new 2023 spreadsheet of Upcoming/Recently Released music.

Don't forget about our ever-growing list of post-punk, goth rock, darkwave, deathrock, etc. releasing labels!

Want to chat about something which doesn't need it's own thread? Do it here!

Feel free to discuss music, fashion, events, DIY projects, etc. and anything relating to goth as long as it's in line with the subreddit rules.