Teen Gothic

As someone in the community, I know about the fetishization that happens to fems/women in the community and it’s ABSOLUTELY disgusting. It’s sad that this happens so often that it’s inspiring memes. But it has never happened to me except on Reddit when I was still a teenager. The last few years it has never happened to me. I don’t know why. I DO NOT want it to happen, I’m just confused. Could be because my style is not the typical goth style. I feel a little left out in some discussions because I can’t relate. But I still do my best to defend fems/women from weirdos.

I have a question for the people who went to ‘Bar Sinister' on the 24th, who was the band who preformed after Antania'?

I want to learn more about Goth Culture down to the tiniest piece, It was my first time going and I enjoyed it so I wanted to know more about their music

Nothing I said was a lie. It's freedom of speech. It's not defamation of character if you believe is what you are saying is the truth. I thought they were supposed to be "against canceling" looks to me like they love it

I want to start by saying that I’m white and not speaking on anyone’s behalf. I’m responding to a pattern I’ve noticed on Reddit and other social media and it’s been bothering me for some time.

Over the years, I’ve seen posts from POC goths who’ve been bullied or excluded for not fitting the “pale” ideal, which is ridiculous. What’s worse is how often their concerns are dismissed with claims that goth has always been inclusive. Even when the intentions behind those comments are good, the impact isn’t. It shuts down conversation instead of addressing the issue.

Yes, goth (and punk before it) was often more accepting than other subcultures. Punk was influenced by rude boy culture, and reggae and dub were played alongside it at shows. But that doesn’t mean racism didn’t exist in those scenes. “More inclusive than average” isn’t the same as being inclusive for everyone.

A lot of us who were born well after the civil rights era (myself included) don’t fully understand what exclusion looked like in practice. I grew up in rural Florida and saw overt racism firsthand, but I never experienced places where Black people simply weren’t allowed, and pretending I fully understand that reality would be dishonest.

We can acknowledge that goth aspired to be inclusive in its inception and still listen when POC goths talk about the real challenges they face today. Giving credit where it’s due shouldn’t come at the expense of dismissing lived experiences.

If we actually care about the values we claim, that means listening, empathizing, and speaking up when we see this kind of thing.

Edit for clarification:

I’m not talking about “permission” to be in the subculture or gatekeeping who gets to call themselves goth. What I am talking about is how, in practice, POC goths are still talked over, dismissed, or told that they’re just one-off incidents.

When someone shares what they’re dealing with and the response is an overwhelming chorus of “goth has always been inclusive,” it can come across as dismissive, even if the intention is good.

Thanks to the wonders of HRT, Testosterone has somewhere along the months turned my pinstraight hair (annoyingly fine, but easily manageable especially for versatility) into what I'd describe as 3A curls. An ungodly beast which can now gobble up a bottle of conditioner and not be satiated.

I've always dyed my hair a green, shaggy short cuts I'd either tease and crimp in college or just have a wolfcut. Now I'm at a loss on what to do, my hair has a lot of volume— but now very bouncy. I've considered just brushing out and bam..bat-nest. But my bangs can't be straightened without reaching past my nose, and if I cut them? Then as a natural curl they'd be tiny on my big beetle forehead.

What do you curly goths do? I feel a bit insecure about my hair, admittedly I never truly realise how little curls I see in the goth community until I was seeking it out.

I've asked in the past buutttttt

1)Where can one go to hang out in Oklahoma City. I've gone to the Grand Royale once. Though from what I could tell, OKC is lacking a bit when it comes to the scene.

aaaaaaaand

2)Any goth latinos in Oklahoma City?

Songs like "Tell Me Your Life" and "That's Why" have all the hallmarks of post-punk, "Kill Me Because I'm Dying" is the ultimate expression of love (not necessarily romantic) after death, "Until You Stop Breathing" speaks of desire in such an exalted way, "Wind" with its line "Bewitch me, let's become eternal," and other songs like "Until I Die," "Shadows in Lost Times," etc., contain certain lyrics that I believe fit perfectly within the gothic genre.

I mean… are there more?

I'm third wave (I think). I became involved with the subculture during the deathrock resurgence of the early to mid-00s. At the time, I understood that an elder goth was someone like my older friend, a first-waver who participated in the incipient goth subculture back in the 80s. In 2024, I'm seeing people in their early 40s applying that term to themselves. What are your thoughts?