Teen Gothic

Just to let you know where I am coming from, I am a goth who has lived in an area that doesn't have much of a local scene, so i mostly participate online.

However, a place nearby is having a goth night soon and I intend to go to enjoy the music and hopefully, make some new friends.

What I am wondering from those of you who regularly go to goth events, are you open to being approached and potentially forming new friendships? or would you rather just be left alone? I don't want to bother people and make them uncomfortable and I figure most people don't want some stranger trying to talk to them when they are just there to dance and enjoy the music, but I am hoping that some people might be interested in talking and forming new friendships

I just discovered this subreddit recently and I like goth music a lot. However I notice that some teenagers think it's just a fashion trend. For me it's about the music. I think the music is amazing and it has helped me recently. I just got into it and I'm 21. People tell me I'm annoying because I say that goth is about the music. I'm not telling anyone that they cant be a goth. I'm just saying they should listen to the music because to me it sounds really good and is worth getting into.

I'm not sure if my opinion is unpopular or not. I just wish I knew more people who actually listened to the music. I'm glad to have found this subreddit. I like a variety of music but mainly goth.

I've always been tall and thin and I honestly hate my body. I have a precious little boy who I absolutely adore, he'll be 2 on the 25th. He's definitely a baby bat as well. He baby dances to Peter Murphy, Sisters of Mercy and The Mission. However, since his birth, I've struggled with it even more. I feel like a caricature of a person.

I used to dress goth and I still have the clothes and makeup but don't do it anymore, mostly due to time constraints. I see my friends, socially distanced of course and they still dress up. It's made me feel like I've lost a huge part of who I am.

It's like I want to dress up but can't find the motivation either. I'm honestly kind of depressed about it and it feels like a vicious cycle. I'm also tired of being told I'm lucky I'm thin. I've struggled to gain and maintain weight my entire life.

Anyway, maybe I'm being petty but it's how I feel. I just need someone to listen and thanks for making it this far. Could you guys maybe give me tips on how to slowly incorporate it back in or should I just go nuclear and dress up? Thanks. 🖤

Edit: I guess I'm also a little scared of scaring my son because he's never seen me like that. I know deep down he'll be fine because all he'll see is mommy but I just don't want to shock him I guess.

I tend to wear black clothing, long hair, etc. I've been this way since my early 20's just purely out of what I like to wear and never intentionally tried to be "goth". I did some Google research on this and am very much attracted to whatever "Romantic goth" is. I tend to listen to classical music, soundtracks, etc. I'm not sure where to begin or even what to do. Figured I'd join this group and see if I could gain some clarity. Thank you.

Before I first got into goth exactly a year ago, I had no idea goth was a music genre. Before, I had been convinced it was some sort of aesthetic, mindset or fashion, and that it would be something I could never pull off. I'm not a very attractive person, and I'm quite literally the opposite of a brooding goth stereotype.

When I got into the music finally, goth no longer became cool to me, but in a very good way. My expectations were subverted, and what I found was a very authentic community with a passionate love for music. I finally belonged. This was much better than something I thought was previously too artificial for my liking.

And that's what I want to say: goth isn't "cool" like you think it is. It baffles me that people view me and others like we're mythical creatures of the night or something, which couldn't be farther from the truth. We're nerds. Music nerds. We gush about post-punk music, we attend clubs and dance like goofballs with our friends, we make memes about Robert Smith and puns about Bela Lugosi's Dead. But it's so fun. This is what goth is to me.

I just want to say that you don't need the goth label to be popular. Goth styles do not exist. We don't all dress like Victorian vampires and hide in the shadows. We don't always wear black. We don't hate people and the world. Goth is about being yourself against a world that wants you to put on a mask and pretend to be someone else. And most goths, shockingly, are just like you and me; regular people just living life to the best.

So then, why do we care about the goth label so much?

It's how we find our music. It's how we find our local scenes. It's how we find each other. Goth is the music that binds us together and celebrates what the music has done to change our lives. It means something very specific to us. That's why we get frustrated when you use "goth" in contexts that don't pertain specifically to our subculture. It makes it harder to really find each other. Worse, some people may never find us because of it.

You may not like it, but you're either a goth, or not.

And it's ok to not be goth.